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The Ghost Train

  • Jason Pritchard
  • Apr 5, 2016
  • 4 min read

So during the Easter weekend I decided we would take the tribe to the seaside, Triplet Mummies parents have a caravan sited about an hour’s drive from our house so it seemed like the best idea in the world at the time, much like this did I suppose:

Any way we pile into the mini-van, looking like we’re trying to beat the world record for most amount of stuff in a car.

The journeys pretty un-eventful by our normal standards but the velociraptors and a 3-year-old (Josh) in a caravan is a whole new world of crazy that I’ll talk about next time.

The focus of this post is that moment your child decides he’s far too adventurous for baby rides at the funfair.

Up until recently Josh hasn't been very brave when it came to fun fair rides, as you would expect he loves the rides with cars and trucks on that go around and around, like the one shown below:

That was until this trip to the seaside. Firstly Josh has a go on the kids merry go round and as expected smiles and waves every time he passes us and we happily snap pictures like most proud parents do, loading the camera up with "we've had a great day at the fun fair" Facebook worthy pictures.

Once the ride finishes Josh bounds over to us quite excited and exclaims “Daddy I want to go on the bumping cars!”. I look at Triplet Mummy and she looks back at me with a kind of “did he really say that?” look. “Josh do you mean the dodgem cars over there?”

“Yes” he says, now I'm not sure if it’s the ice cream, sun or copious amounts of sugar filled sweets that has turned him into this adrenalin seeking extreme thrill chasing kid but whatever it was he wanted to go on the dodgems.

We measure him against the height chart and he’s a few centimetres tall enough. Result, at least we won't be faced with a disappointed child tantrum! so we make our way to a little bumper car and I climb in with him, strap him in, and we’re off. I'm cautiously moving around the track like something from Driving Miss Daisy which he seems less than impressed with. At this point the inevitable happens and someone crashed into us which to Josh is as exciting as staring in his own Surprise Egg video!

Now we’re off, bashing into everyone in sight and driving like someone in a high speed police chase, until the ride comes to an end.

Once off we head back to Triplet Mummy who has been entertaining the velociraptors, Josh can’t wait to tell her how great it was and how much he loved it.

While embracing this new little adrenalin junky persona that Josh has developed Triplet Mummy asks him what he would like to go on next, and his response will blow your mind in the same way it blew ours!

“Mummy I want to go on the scary house”, pointing to what looks like a run-down old ghost train that has seen better days (sometime in the mid 80s I would imagine).

Now as much as this new Joshie is pretty cool, we think that the thought of a ghost train, even as dilapidated looking as this one wasn't a good idea so try to talk him out of it. He’s adamant though the ghost train is next on the I must conquer list.

Grudgingly I take him to the entrance to the ride where we were met by a pre-pubescent teen collecting the ride tokens. He looks at me with a kind of puzzled "do you really want to be doing this?" look. Now that should have been enough to warn me that all was not as it seems.

We sit in a rickety old cart and start to move through a door with a badly drawn ghost on it, this seems ok, it’ll be some sheets pretending to be ghosts and some flashing lights.

WHAT THE F**K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!We've just entered the gates of hell and I'm accompanied be a 3-year-old. What twisted person came up with this ride. There are screaming things, things that jump out and I'm sure I witnessed Satan himself running around in there slaying Father Christmas and the Easter bunny, this is pure evil!

Josh is clinging to me like I can save him from his impending death, when in reality if shit goes down I can run faster than him!

The ride lasts for about an hour (3 minutes really) in which time it’s safe to say neither of us will be the same again.

We come to the end and I lift Josh out of the cart, he's got a very pale look on his face that says “don’t make me go in there again”.

Mummy asks if he liked it to which he responds “Mummy that scared me a bit”, a bit, it frightened the f**king life out of me!

The lesson to be learnt here is that although kids might think they’re grown up don’t let them fool you into going on a run-down looking ghost train, you’ll never sleep again. You have been warned!

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